Hey, babe, wanna make out?
Is MRA thinking simply beyond satire?
Cartoonist Rebecca Cohen (@GynoStar on Twitter) recently decided to offer a satirical take on the false rape accusation paranoia that’s endemic in Men’s Rights circles, producing the list of tips below, designed to mirror some of the terrible advice that’s regularly given to women on how to avoid rape.
It turns out that Men’s Rights Redditors think she has some good ideas.
In a recent thread on the Men’s Rights subreddit, the regulars considered her list and decided to add some suggestions of their own. Only their suggestions weren’t meant as jokes.
Ted8367 offered six “Real tips to keep yourself safe” inspired directly by Cohen’s originals.
- Always Be Recording. That’s your real buddy.
- Try not to go out alone at any time. The more potential witnesses there are around, the better.
- If you must walk alone at night … stay on well-lighted paths where your camera will work better.
- If you meet a woman who has been drinking, leave immediately.
- I couldn’t think of one for this. How do false rape accusers dress anyway?
- Maybe just avoid college campuses altogether for social events. Go into town instead.
(Emphasis mine, because, woah.)
Elebrin had six suggestions of his own, “essentially for college students.”
- live off campus
- don’t date girls at your school
- don’t pick up women at bars or places that are serving alcohol
- keep your head down so the administration doesn’t have a reason to be watching you
- When you do go out, dress in a way that isn’t intimidating. The black hoodie pulled tightly around your face or the muscle shirt that shows off your gorilla arms is probably a bad plan. Your best bet is to learn to dress “professionally” and do that the majority of the time.
- know who the potentially dangerous people and groups are and stay away from them. If they are going to be protesting an event, don’t go to that event. Don’t participate in protests yourself – keep your honest opinions about controversial subjects behind a wall of anonymity.
If you see this woman, RUN LIKE THE WIND, obviously.
Other MRAs piped up with suggestions of their own.
don’t talk to women on campus unless its about school/work/emergency.
videorecord all your activities, even sex acts, using bodycam
I’m sure your dates will be thrilled when you strip down to nothing but socks and a plainly visible bodycam.
[N]ever touch an American woman under circumstances, and try not to be alone with them, always have witnesses.
Don’t fuck women in college. Ever.
Don’t fuck SJWs, ever.
avoid feminist women, outside of the classroom or the workplace, just stay away from them.
avoid women like the plague and never talk to them except for school and work related issues and topics.
I was going to make a comment about the incredible paranoia going on here, but, you know, it probably would be a good thing if all of the world’s MRAs actually did decide to avoid women altogether and perhaps all went and lived on an island together.
In another thread on “false accusations” a couple of weeks ago, other Men’s Rights Redditors offered some strikingly similar advice:
If you’re going to be intimate with a woman, make sure you have some sort of video evidence of the act.
Stay away from college girls. You can record and CYA all year long, but many times evidence won’t save you. The emotional maturity of women is plummeting. Obviously they’re not worth having anything to do with until they’re older. Probaby MUCH older, if at all.
Keep a camera running in your room if you have a female guest. Do not (obviously) share such recordings with any person other than for giving evidence. Do keep it stored safely in case of a later accusation.
Keep an alibi app running on your smartphone (there are many, but Alibi is one I know of on Android that’s good) and switch it on when in an intimate situation with a woman. This will give you extra audio evidence.
If a woman shows even the most minimal sign of reservation with you during intimacy, walk away immediately.
Still others had more original advice:
If you break up with a girl try to make it look that she broke up with you and not the other way around
Er, ok.
Turn gay. Worked pretty well for me.
Well, at least one of these guys is thinking outside the box.
