Rebel Wilson, destroying the world
On Return of Kings, the internet’s premier lady-hating garbage site, one of the regular contributors is trying his hand at philosophy again. It’s not going very well.
Max Roscoe, who describes himself as “an aspiring philosopher king,” has decided to take on what he sees as the evils of “modern liberal democracy.”
As he sees it, “the western culture today destroys everything it touches,” creating
weak men, shrill, out of shape, and damaged women, a decrepit culture, and declining values.
His number one complaint? That “western culture” has destroyed Asians. Not through cultural imperialism or anything like that. Roscoe thinks that Asians in Asia are fine. But the Asians he encounters in the west are something else entirely.
Asians are naturally thin, petite, and healthy—IN ASIA. … However, when Asians move to the west and adopt our culture, diet, and lifestyle, they become overweight, slutty, and often mutilate their bodies and experiment with gender fluidity.
That’s right. Western culture is evil because it makes hot Asian babes into genderqueer fatties.
It angers me every time I see a fat Asian, because I know how difficult it is for Asians to work against their biology to become fat.
ROSCOE ANGRY! ROSCOE SMASH!
Don’t worry, western women! Roscoe hates you gals too.
Roscoe makes his case against American women by contrasting a photo of sorority girls from the early 1970s, in which “all are smiling, thin, with long hair, in skirts or dresses with heels,” with a photo of an extremely obese woman wearing a stars-and-stripes bikini, which Roscoe seems to have taken from a YouTube video with the slightly awkward title “BEST FAT People Fail Compilation – Obese People Falling Down Fails.”
To aspiring philosopher-king Roscoe, this is all the evidence he needs to prove “that the quality of women offered today in the West is abysmal.”
Indeed, in Roscoe’s eyes, domestically produced women are made so badly that American men should probably seek out foreign imports.
If you haven’t been abroad within the last year, plan a trip now, if for no other reason than to see what is possible. We do not have to accept the low quality females we are being offered here.
Roscoe does not limit his critique of Western liberal democracy to the Fat Chick Problem. He is also critical of non-fat women who do things to their bodies (and minds) that Roscoe does not approve of.
[I]t angers me when I see a thin, kind, young woman who has pierced and mutilated her body with graffiti and shrapnel, and has taken up the cause for feminism. Without a strong, patriarchal system to guide her, she becomes an enemy of civilization itself.
Apparently Roosh requires all Return of Kings writers to refer to piercings as “shrapnel.”
But there is more wrong with modern Western culture than its tendency to produce fat chicks and tattooed feminists. Roscoe is also angry that:
- Westerners dance like Miley Cyrus and/or “Elaine Benice” [sic] from Seinfeld.
- “American Millennial men” have become “shallow, silly, weak, vapid, directionless, and boring.”
- The “the profit-at-all-costs fascist system” of modern capitalism makes most jobs pretty sucky.
- Young couples no longer litter or make out in public because they’re all “play[ing] on their smartphones.”
Ok, I admit I don’t quite get that last point. So let’s back up and try it again.
Complaining that smartphones have led to a world bereft of “physical and emotional intimacy, save for the actual moment of banging your partner,” Roscoe posts two pictures to show what has apparently gone wrong.
In the first, from 1967, young people make out on park benches in New York’s Tompkins Square Park, surrounded by litter.
Paradise lost?
In the second photo, meant to represent a “Millennial couple on a typical date, 2016,” a couple sitting on a patch of grass check their phones. No litter is visible. Smartphones bad, litter good!
CHECKMATE FEMINISTS!
I guess it’s kind of hard to work up a powerful critique of Western Liberal Democracy if the cornerstone of your philosophy is NO FAT CHICKS.