By David Futrelle

The Daily Stormer is expansive in its hatreds. The site’s writers (and readers) not only hate Jews, black people, women, and LGBTQ folks; they also, in keeping with Nazi tradition, despise anyone they see as somehow defective, especially if they can be blamed for their alleged defects.

And so it’s hardly surprising that Stormers hate fat people. What is perhaps a little surprising is the vehemence of their hatred.

In a couple of recent posts on the site, the Stormer writer who calls himself Pomidor Quixote launches an outright war on fat people. In the first, he cites a study of rats to “prove” that the children of fat mothers age more quickly, concluding that parenting-while-fat is “a form of child abuse that has devastating health and social consequences,”

And he’s just getting started:

Allowing overweight people to reproduce is really no different than allowing meth addicts to become parents.

Unless they fix their serious addiction problems first, they shouldn’t be anywhere near children.

This is all horrible, but there is a rather striking irony to Quixote’s sideways swipe at meth addicts, given that a recent book has shown that meth was used as a performance-enhancing drug by the Nazis, and many soldiers ended up addicts.

In his second recent post on the fat menace, “Quixote” takes his argument (such as it is) even further. Citing an OECD study (as summarized by Bloomberg), he concludes that

The obese are not being as productive as normal people, so they’re not contributing the same as normal people.

Yet they are responsible for governments spending hundreds of billions of dollars trying to keep them alive.

Why are governments trying to keep the obese alive if the obese can’t even perform properly?

Because we don’t kill people, or let them die, because, statistically speaking, they’re slightly less productive than skinny people due to taking more sick days.

Also, as a fat person, I have to say that I really haven’t noticed the government doing much of anything to keep me alive.

We know how to force them to lose weight, but for some reason these fat monsters are given the freedom to decide what to eat despite having proved time and time again that they’re incapable of making choices that would result in them losing the weight.

Diets, broadly speaking, don’t work; the overwhelming majority of those who lose weight through dieting end up gaining the weight back. And this sort of yo-yo dieting can have far worse effects on health than being overweight.

Quixote continues, each new sentence more unhinged than the last:

Why are productive, slim people paying for the freedom of the obese?

It’s a kind of slavery.

These monsters are enslaving healthy humans!

Nazi that he is, Quixote concludes with a very on-brand “solution.” He wants fat people rounded up and put in “starvation camps.”

[T]he problem with fat creatures isn’t really a lack of education about food and exercise. They know that if they ate less, they’d lose weight or at least stop getting fatter. They know that eating a lot causes them to gain weight.

It’s a kind of addiction and everything points to them not being able to handle it on their own.

They have to be put in starvation camps and given only water and a bit of salt until they lose all the excess weight.

Setting aside the moral depravity of this, er, “solution,” starvation camps aren’t exactly what you might call practical. For one thing, according to the OECD study Quixote himself cites, more than half the adults in OECD countries (that is, most of the developed world) are classified as overweight or obese.

In the US, 72% of adults are overweight, and 40% are obese, according to the CDC. To fulfill Quixote’s cruel fantasy, you’d have to lock up something like 160 million people — quite a responsibility for the remaining 60 million adults.

Quixote also seems to have forgotten that Nazis themselves aren’t immune to the alleged “addiction” of being overweight. Indeed, while Quixote may be, for all I know, perfectly svelte, there are plenty of fat Nazis, and some of them — like the fugitive from justice known as Azzmador — have even written for the Daily Stormer.

Hell, Hermann Göring was famously fat. Would Quixote have sent him to the starvation camps too? Somehow I think not.

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By David Futrelle

Right-wingers really don’t like the idea of Pharrell Willians in a dress, huh?

Earlier this week, GQ magazine unveiled a special issue devoted to what it called the “new masculinity.” On the cover: pop music artiste Pharrell, wearing a gown, I guess, that looked vaguely like a sleeping bag for an octopus. Inside the magazine, Pharrell models an assortment of barely less-dramatic gender-bendy outfits and offers his thoughts on new models or masculinity in a long and rambling interview.

Naturally, the defenders of traditional masculinity were shocked and stunned. On Twitter, right-wing ideologues like Mike Cernovich and Paul Joseph Watson sniffed their disapproval. “The New Masculinity looks pretty gay,” former Gamergate grifter Ethan Ralph opined.

You’d think that Mr. Ralph would be more open to a challenge to old-fashioned toxic masculinity, given that one of the former editors for his website literally stabbed his father to death in a rage (allegedly) in the midst of an argument over online conspiracy theories.

Other commenters on Twitter were a bit blunter:

Meanwhile, assorted right-wing rags offered more extended, er, critiques of the issue. The American Conservative declared that GQ had “emasculate[d]” itself by rounding up, and listening to, an assortment of writers, activists, comedians and others who weren’t all straight white men. (The horror!)

Spectator USA denounced what it saw as

a bunch of pouting narcissists in ugly €1,000 jackets talking down to men who struggle to improve themselves and build and sustain their families is disgusting. Frankly, they can roll their issue up and perch atop it.

But perhaps the most panicked reaction of the bunch came from Brandon Morse of RedState.com, clearly upset that GQ was, as per his headline, “Overtly Celebrat[ing] the Feminization of Men.”

Really putting the “his” in “histrionic,” Morse began his piece by announcing that “[o]ne of the largest projects being undertaken by the regressive left is the elimination of men.”

Morse devoted much of his article to a defense of “true masculinity” against the evil spectacle of men wearing dresses or “just ditching being a man altogether to embrace transgenderism.” The centerpiece of his argument? Wolves.

[I]t’s not femininity that’s been keeping the literal and proverbial wolves in the hills for thousands of years. When evil begins carrying out its purposes, it’s not people like Pharrell showing up in dresses that put it down. It’s not the “new masculinity” that’s going to charge into battle to protect those it loves at the risk of its own life.

Huh. I hate to break it to Morse, but there aren’t a lot of manly dudes out there wrestling literal wolves to protect the ladyfolk. Indeed, as our old friend Wikipedia notes,

There are few historical records or modern cases of wolf attacks in North America. In the half-century up to 2002, there were eight fatal attacks in Europe and Russia, three in North America, and more than 200 in south Asia

And back here in reality the “proverbial wolves” that “true masculine” men are supposedly so nobly protecting women from are overwhelmingly … other “true masculine” men.

In many case there is no protection to be found. Roughly a third of all women worldwide have been the victims of sexual violence. 50,000 women are murdered worldwide by their intimate partners or family members – that is, in the overwhelming majority of cases, by the very men who are supposedly protecting them from “wolves.” (Both of these stats are from the United Nations.)

That’s a big part of why we’re talking about developing a new model of masculinity in the first place.

While the right-wing attacks on GQ’s “new masculinity” are both hysterical and incoherent, Pharrell may not exactly be the ideal poster boy for this particular cause. Sure, he makes a fine model for the various outfits the folks at GQ handed him. But his thoughts on the subject of masculinity – while well-intentioned — are a mixture of trite cliché and baffling new-age babble. Over the course of this gas giant of an interview, Pharell serves up thousands of words of free-associational babble that only occasionally comes to the point.

I think the truest definition of masculinity is the essence of you that understands and respects that which isn’t masculine. If you ask me, when we talk about masculinity, it’s also very racial, this conversation. Because the dominant force on this planet right now is the older straight white male. And there’s a particular portion of them that senses a tanning effect. They sense a feminizing effect. They sense a nonbinary effect when it comes to gender.

Other time he seems to be prothletizing for the Church of Our Lady of the Bleeding Obvious:

You know, America was “created by our Founding Fathers”—not our Founding Mothers or our Founding Mother and Father. Right?

In one telling passage, he tries to empathize with trans folks, but in the end brings the converstation back around to himself:

Because think about it. What is happening to a transgender person? What are they going through? They feel like their body is not connected to their spirit. And what kind of toxic environment do we live in that they have to justify how they feel? That must feel incredibly insane. That is spiritual warfare. So I wanted to be in the conversation.

Well, sure, dude. Be in the conversation. But maybe not the center of it? There are a lot of other people out there with far more interesting things to say than the guy who’s only just getting around to apologizing for “Blurred Lines.”

Pharrell could perhaps learn a thing or two from some of the diverse assortment of other voices featured elsewhere in the magazine – especially lesbian comedian Hannah Gatsby, who had a few pointed suggestions for the men in the room.

“Hello, the men,” she began.

Here’s a thought experiment: What if you, the men, looked to traditional feminine traits and tried incorporating them into your masculinity?

Women are always being encouraged to stir masculine traits into their feminine recipe. We are told to “be bolder!” “Speak up in meetings.” “Exaggerate your skills.” All that Lean In sort of crap. So perhaps it’s time for you, the men, to be more ladylike. How about you scale back on your confidence? How about you try not to act in every situation? What if you tried to refrain from sharing your opinions or co-opting other people’s ideas?

Sometimes the best way for a man to contribute to a discussion is to shut up and just listen for a while. Or, in the case of the folks at RedState and The American Conservative and the rest of the right-wing critics, to shut their traps forever.

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By David Futrelle

Hey ladies of the cis persuasion, don’t you just love it when some dude on a date with you leans in close and, in his sexiest voice, says, “hey babe, I know your deepest, darkest sexy secret: You love to vacuum your apartment when you’re ovulating.”

This scenario comes to you from an old (very old) AskMen post by actual professional “dating coach” David DeAngelo that I ran across today. It’s a masterpiece of inadvertent humor, offering some of the worst dating advice I’ve ever seen, of which the weird and completely incorrect claim about ovulation vacuuming is only the cherry on top of a huge crap sundae.

DeAngelo’s listicle purports to offer ten tips on how to “flirt with a woman sexually,” but the vast majority of his suggestions are variations on one central theme: throw blatant sexual innuendo into the conversation at every possible opportunity and even some impossible ones.

The English language is literally packed with words you can twist around to create sexual meanings. Wet, juicy, hard, fast, hot — the possibilities are endless. For example, if she says her drink is big, you can reply with something like: “Big can be a good thing, don’t you think?”

SUBTLE, DUDE.

But you don’t need to wait for a woman to use some sexy double-entendre-ready word in order to get the sexy innuendo going. Even a cup of tea can be enough.

[L]et’s say you get a woman a cup of tea; you can follow up by saying: “Looks like you’re on the receiving end today. Do you always receive or do you like to give at times too?” Crack a slight smile and she will know exactly what you are talking about.

It’s like talking to someone who responds to every single thing you say with “that’s what she said.”

While DeAngelo warns would-be pickup artists to model themselves on James Bond, not Austin Powers, a lot of his suggestions would make you sound more than a little like the Mike Meyers character, minus the fake accent (unless you’re doing that too, which is also not recommended).

One of the best ways to get the fun started is to accuse a woman of trying to seduce you. For example, if she mentions something about her house, such as: … “Do you know how to install a wireless router?” you should say: “Wow, you are trying to get me to come over to your house already?” … Women love it when you do this. Don’t be surprised if she really does try to get you to come over soon after.

Or, as Austin Powers would put it “oh, behave!”

You can also turn practically anything she says about you that’s even vaguely positive into an excuse to brag about how good you allegedly are at fucking.

Women want men who know how to please them, but you can’t come right out and say: “I’m a great lover.” Instead, use sexual innuendo to indirectly convey this message. For example, say you are at your place making a drink for a woman and she says: “Wow, you’re good at that.” Look her square in the eye and say: “I’m good at a lot of things.”

She’ll get the hint that you’re a stud and be dying to find out more.

OK, this one might possibly work. But only if were pretty clear already that she was way into you. And if you did the eyebrow thing like Pooh up there while putting on your dopiest smirk.

But the strangest bit of advice in the whole list still has to be tip #2,
“Let her know you know,” aka “The ovulation thing”

Take it away, David DeAngelo you big weirdo:

Want to know a secret about female sexuality that 99% of men don’t know? Here it is: Many women feel compelled to vacuum their house when they’re ovulating.

Some experts believe it has something to do with wanting to “clean the nest” before laying her “egg.”

So, when a woman tells you she is vacuuming, say: “Vacuuming? Are you ovulating or something?” She’ll be stunned that you know this and wonder what else you know about female sexuality.

She’ll be stunned alright, but not for the reason you think, buddy.

Of course, if she doesn’t know what you mean, fill her in. Women love it when you teach them something new — especially about themselves.

Just in case there are any aspiring pickup artists reading this post, who don’t understand why this is so wrong, wrong, wrong, here are three reasons why you should not tell women they’re secretly compelled to vacuum when they’re ovulating.

1. Contrary to DeAngelo’s claim, no woman wants to hear some “secret” you “know” about the way her body works.
2. Ovulation is not really a “sexy” topic so much as a “creepy” one to bring up unbidden on a first date.
3. And, oh yeah, because IT’S NOT TRUE JESUS CHRIST THERE IS NO RELATION BETWEEN OVULATION AND VACUUMING WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

And you don’t have to take my word for it. One of the perks of doing this blog is that whenever I run across some particularly egregious misunderstanding of human reproduction I can run it past world-famous vagina expert Dr. Jen Gunter — author of the bestselling The Vagina Bible — and she will actually get back to me.

Here’s what she had to say in response to DeAngelo’s Tip #2:

I have no words. That is stupid. It is a sophomoric fantasy of a hot, horny, housewife. …

That can only be from someone who has a kindergarten level understanding of human reproduction.

Hey, that’s what she said!

H/T — r/BadWomensAnatomy

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By David Futrelle

Twenty women have accused opera singer Placido Domingo of sexual harassment and, in at least one case, of outright sexual assault. In Quillette, reactionary propagandist Heather MacDonald argues that, regardless of the truth or falsity of their accusations, these women are simply too unimportant to be allowed to derail the career of “an artist of Domingo’s stature.”

MacDonald, a Manhattan Institute fellow whose politics lie in the general vicinity of the so-called “Intellectual Dark Web,” devotes a good deal of her essay to glorifying the talents of the “Three Tenors” alum — praising his “warm, soaring voice” and his “remarkable pitch control” and declaring him “one of classical music’s greatest ambassadors and impresarios.”

Never mind that, according to an Associated Press investigation, Domingo’s reputation as a predator was such an open secret in the profession that staffers went through elaborate machinations to try to ensure he he was never alone with a woman. MacDonald treats Domingo’s mostly anonymous accusers with a deep disdain, dismissing these “females” as “small-time soloists” and “disgruntled bit players.”

MacDonald seems to have no trouble imagining that at least some of the accusations are true; she just can’t bring herself to care. The alleged incidents took place long ago, she repeatedly notes, and besides, it’s not like the now-elderly singer is going to keep harassing and groping women in his vicinity.

At one point, astoundingly, she posits that he might well have felt a professional obligation to act out the part of a sex-obsessed lothario.

“As the object of so much sexual attention” from fans, she writes,

Domingo could have been forgiven for thinking that his own advances were part of the mix. He clearly belongs to the “Latin Lover” prototype, a good-natured, charming seducer from the old Hollywood era. Learning to deal with such types used to be part of a woman’s skill set. 

But MacDonald’s most outrageous argument, one that makes clear her profound elitism and lack of empathy for whole classes of human beings she clearly considers disposable, is that Domingo is too important to accuse.

It is a grotesque inversion of the proper hierarchy between public accomplishment and private sexual behavior to sacrifice an artist of Domingo’s stature for the sake of 20 disgruntled bit players, laboriously harvested from thousands of professional interactions characterized by graciousness and consideration.

How dare these unimportant women sully the reputation of such a star — especially because he only (allegedly) harassed a small percentage of those he interacted with. Which is a bit like saying we should ignore a serial killer’s crimes because most days he wasn’t killing anyone at all.

Put simply, the discomfort of these belated accusers decades ago is not worth Domingo’s head.

Harassing and groping is evidently a-OK if you have perfect pitch control.

Civilization rests on the realm of public achievement in ideas, politics, and art. The private realm of Eros should be subordinate to the public realm; how someone behaves in or getting to the bedroom is irrelevant to his achievements in the public square, absent criminality.

Do I need to point out that sexual assault is a criminal offense?

If we discovered that James Madison, say, was a skirt-chaser, that fact should have no bearing on his achievements as a political theorist and statesman.

The flaws of even the most eminent of thinkers are highly relevant to our assessment of their legacies. Historians have long wrestled with the fact that many of America’s “founding fathers” were both champions of freedom (for white people) while at the same time owning and, in the case of Thomas Jefferson, raping slaves.

Yes, as MacDonald argues, “Domingo brought beauty into the world.” He also seems to have brought great ugliness into the lives of many women around him. No amount of talent can absolve a sexual predator.

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By David Futrelle

Everybody’s favorite racist, lady-hating philosopher-impersonator has found a new target for his wrath: wine moms.

Well, he’s right about one thing: Women do indeed drink more wine than men — 57% percent of the total, according to the Wine MArket Council. And female drinking has increased dramatically in recent years.

But if Stefan were truly interested in pointing out the problems caused by parental drinking — as he insists he is — he wouldn’t just point his finger at mothers. While women drink more wine, men drink more alcohol in general; they’re twice as likely to binge drink and nearly twice as likely to be alcoholics. Wine mom, meet Booze dad.

But don’t worry, moms and moms-to-be! Stefan still wants you to have more babies, at least if you’re not a Muslim immigrant. Or someone with a job. Shortly after he posted his attack on wine moms, he posted these helpful tips for The Ladies:

So chop chop, Ladies, start popping out those babies as fast as you can. Just don’t pop open any bottles of wine when the little buggers have you at wits end.

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By David Futrelle

Some public intellectuals are so public that they inspire entire mini-genres of memes. One can find innumerable memes featuring the indomitable Marxist philosopher and hot dog fan Slavoj Zizek, left icon Noam Chomsky, and panopticon theorist Michel Foucault; even someone as seemingly memeproof as Susan Sontag has inspired a few. Lesser intellects like antifeminist think-tanker Christina Hoff Sommers and wannabe thinker Ben Shapiro have somehow inspired memes of their own.

Then there’s Jordan Peterson. The reactionary Canadian fussbudget psychologist has inspired more than his fair share of memes, of course. But he also inspires something more: actual fan art — paintings and drawings that have been fussed over for hours.

Some are near-photo-realistic portraits, skillfully done if not terribly original — most are copied or traced directly from photos circulating online. Though done with love and a great deal of earnestness, they’re not always what you might call flattering to Dr. P. (Click on any of the pics below to see the full-sized originals.)

The further they get from their photo originals, the weirder they become. This guy almost gets the head right, but he seems to have used a package of hot dogs as his reference for Dr. P’s fingers.

I don’t know what this guy was thinking; he’s clearly got some technical skills but the results don’t look much like Dr. P or anyone else in particular.

This alleged portrait of the not-so-good doctor looks more like a black velvet painting of some rockabilly artist no one’s ever heard of.

Here Dr. P looks a bit like a startled deer.

Here he looks about 14 years old:

The proportions in this one are so far off I can only conclude it was drawn while looking in a funhouse mirror.

Oh, they get weirder.

… and even weirder than that.

In case you’re really taken with Zombie Peterson here, you can buy an 28″ by 28″ art print of him for the low, low price of $53.99 — reduced to $37.79 if you act by midnight tonight!!!1!!

But the strangest bit of Peterson fan art I’ve seen thus far has to be anime Peterson, complete with the requisite huge eyes and hair that seems to have been borrowed from Milo Yiannopoulos.

It’s the kind of art that makes you ask yourself WHY WHY WHY?

Look, I understand why people do fan art — if you’ve got the talent (and even if you don’t) it’s fun to draw pics of your pop star idols or your favorite characters from a show you love. It’s possible that when I was in college I might have drawn/traced pics of Prince and Adam Ant because, I dunno, I liked their music and thought they looked cool. But I was never tempted to draw pictures of my intellectual idols, who were decidedly less glamorous and, more importantly, it just would have seemed wrong somehow, at odds with the sort of skepticism and critical thinking that they promoted.

Drawing glamorized pictures of Jordan Peterson seems even more wrong. Idolized as a Great Thinker for our age, he’s actually a ponderous lightweight offering little more than reheated Jung mixed with assorted reactionary bromides. When he moves beyond the trite — “Clean your room” — he can barely write a coherent sentence to save his life. He’s a misogynist and a transphobe and a dietary crank.

Yes, I made fun of most of these pictures. But I’m much less bothered by the assorted artistic failures on display here than I am by the fact that these drawings exist at all. Peterson doesn’t deserve fans, much less fan art. Find someone or something better to draw. Might I suggest kitties?

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By David Futrelle

Roosh V is over the moon. So over it.

Or at least the moon landings. In a post on his Roosh V forums earlier this week, the rapey-pickup-artist-turned-Christian-crackpot announced that he’s become a moon landing denier, citing the powerful evidence of fraud he had found in some random YouTube video on the subject.

“I first had doubts about the moon landing around 2015, but didn’t come to a definitive conclusion,” he wrote.

As the years went on, I was sympathetic to moon deniers because it was clear that those in power are lying about everything. If you catch someone in one lie, such as your wife, it’s natural to evaluate other things they’ve stated to you as fact. I started to believe that it was more likely we didn’t land on the moon than not.

I’m ready now to come out as a moon landing denier. 

This is pretty crackpottish in itself, but it’s when he was asked to defend his position that things got really weird.

One of the commenters in the thread tried to appeal to Roosh’s faith in human ingenuity, only to find out he had none.

“Personally I rather believe in the human ingenuity, ” wrote the commenter,

our remarkable ability to accomplish something so challenging when we put our mind into it. This is the same belief and inspiration that we want to instill in our children and the future generations.

In his reply Roosh seemed to suggest that human ingenuity, and perhaps all of science itself, was part of a sneaky gay “secular humanist” revolt against God.

“This is called ‘secular humanism’,” Roosh sneered,

and is what has allowed us to inherit the world we have today. In other words, “human ingenuity” leads to gay pride, feminism, transgender children, deplatforming, fake news, etc. etc.

It’s not clear if Roosh thinks science is itself part of the plot, or if the plot simply involves people saying good things about science. If the former, there’s more than a bit of irony here. Before he became a professional pickup artist, Roosh was a lab technician, who presumably believed in the science underlying his job. When he started making bread in an automatic breadmaker not that long ago he proudly declared himself a “bread scientist.”

And of course he wrote these words on his laptop or a phone to post on the Internet.

Weird how selective science deniers can be in their denials of science. Moon landing deniers have no problem believing in the smart phones they hold in their hands. Flat Earthers have no trouble beliving YouTube is real.

Of course Roosh isn’t the only manosphere crackpot to deny the moon landings happened. Nazi-adjacent fantasy author Vox Day declared earlier this year that the mood landings were “one giant hoax for mankind.”

And in a post on his blog yesterday he seemed to come out as a flat earther.

Notice that ALL of the hemisphere photography we think we’ve seen has turned out to be nonexistent. It’s becoming clear that from the evolution fairy tale to the Blue Marble fraud to the dinosaur fraud and the satellite myth, the world is very, very different than we have been told it is. What is the point? To deceive you into serving Satan rather than God.

Could it be …

The satellite balloon technology also explains how the US can keep putting up satellites despite not having any rockets capable of sending up astronauts. I particularly enjoyed the video of the NASA satellite released by the Space Shuttle that was dangling from a wire.

Yeah, I must have missed that video.

Vox later clarified his remarks in the comments, stating flatly that he wasn’t a flat earther. Apparently he’s just someone who thinks that satellite photos are routinely faked, that satellites themselves are held up in the sky by balloons, and that the moon landing was just the world’s most elaborate hoax. Just normal regular stuff to believe.

I’m not sure what he thinks “dinosaur fraud” is all about. Maybe they go around passing a lot of bad checks?

Hey, that theory makes as much sense as suggesting that satellites are balloon-powered tools of Satan.

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By David Futrelle

Great news, ladies! The Red Pill subreddit is hiring … wives.

In a recent post on the subreddit, someone calling himself, ahem, afterthe_fapocalypse argued that when it comes to finding a wife, men should “look for an employee not a partner” because, you know, equality is simply out of the question.

“Having my shit together,” he writes,

no woman can be a partner to me. None. They just aren’t built like that. And as the relationship manager then, my role is not to look for a partnership but to hire an employee. A high-level one, but someone who will work for me and develop the next generation of employees (children) growing up. That will be her project. Mine is ensuring that the whole system (family) functions.

What a romantic!

If this dude, god forbid, ever gets married I hope his soon-to-be-ex-wife cites this post of his in her divorce filing.

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By David Futrelle

The Semen Retention subreddit is a place of magic and wonder. That is, many of its inhabitants believe that the simple non-activity of not masturbating for an extended length of time gives them literal magic power. As for the wonder, well, I wonder just what it is they’re smoking.

Semen retainers, or at least a lot of them, believe that their militant non-wanking allows them to build up a vast amount of physical and psychic energy that makes them magnetically irresistible, “aligns [their] spirit with the Tao,” and even allows them to “bend reality” with their mind.

But this newfound energy brings not only joy but also real danger — from those who sense their new power and try to steal their lucky charms. Semen Retainers regularly warn their fellow non-wankers about the dangers of female “energy vampires” eager to drain their energies along with their balls.

“In a fertile state,” a semen-retaining Redditor called salinorum wrote,

women turn into a form of energetic leach in which the a woman is looking to withdraw the vital seminal fluid of a man for the purposes of reproduction.

That is possibly the least sexy sentence ever written in the English language. Somehow I doubt this guy is going to get Penthouse to publish any of his letters any time soon.

Of course not all woman want to get pregnant when they are fertile, at least consciously. But their sexual hardwiring kicks in and results in a subconscious desire to have sex with the most fit man possible. I’ve realized women are very dangerous during their fertile period, almost like a vampire or leach. Rather than thirsting for your blood, they want your good seed.

He then told a harrowing tale about some woman who, he thinks, wanted to hook up with him for his magic sperm.

I realized the power of a woman during this full moon. A woman who lives in a separate apartment in the same house as mine, kept coming around to my apartment these past couple days looking for me to initiate a hook up. I could tell she was very fertile, because likewise, a man is also attuned to a woman’s sexual fitness. All men are most attracted to women at their peak fertile period. The woman’s lips become redder, her skin glows, her pheromones are probably full blast, and she looks her absolute best versus all other stages of her ovulatory cycle.

So this woman kept coming around my apartment waiting for me to initiate.

–

Apparently female energy vampires, despite their hunger for sexual energy, are too shy to actually ask men if they want to fuck.

He drew the obvious lesson from this terrifying experience involving a women who talked to him a couple of times when he was very horny.

So my fellow SR brethren, be warned of women who attempt to steal your essence and seed. Your power and mental clarity is diminished in each sexual act you perform with her whether it occurs in the sheets or merely in your head. … I think I understand the term succubus better now than ever.

But women don’t just want your, er, seed, he warned his fellow non-masturbators. They want your psychic energy as well!

[W]oman are reading both your sexual and spiritual indicators which are likely communicated in your magnetic / auric field. Thus when a woman attempts to lure your sexual or mental attention towards her, she is literally withdrawing energy from both your spiritual and physical body. …

And although perhaps women are not consciously aware of their talent at reading indicators of men’s physical and spiritual fitness, it is still a language in which all women are highly attuned. Once more, choose who you give attention to wisely for there is a literal energetic extrication occurring on both the mental and physical planes!

Damn, ladies! What gives? I didn’t know any of this stuff.

I’m putting tinfoil over my junk just in case.

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By David Futrelle

Racist trolls are planning a Halloween version of the “It’s Okay to be White” poster campaign that garnered them a good deal of press — as well as support from the likes of David Duke, the Daily Stormer, and Tucker Carlson — when it was originally launched back in 2017.

One of the places they’re looking for recruits just happens to be the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, where a post championing the postering campaign has garnered more than 300 upvotes and spurred a heated, if somewhat lopsided, debate. “There is a war on men in the West,” wrote MyBordersMyChoice.

White men are considered to be the worst kind. That’s why “It’s Okay To Be White” posters will be going up this Halloween … in public spaces around the world. All are welcome to join and help undermine this anti-white, anti-male ideology. Who’s in?

Apparently more than a few MGTOW Redditors.

Some argued that the postering campaign is necessary because SJW “bigotry” against white males might cause them to become racist.

“Good,” a commenter called TigPlaze wrote of the postering plan.

I used to think there was no need for that, and some years back there wasn’t. There is a need for it now. Some bigots, especially feminist ones, think there’s something wrong or evil with being a white male. They think flipping bigotry around is a great way to get rid of bigotry, but they’re only exchanging one type for another. Or maybe not. The hate against while males might encourage white men to feel anger toward others and even cause more bigotry.

Another commenter added that “Straight white christian men are the most oppressed group on earth.”

Still others suggested the campaign wasn’t about racist but “pride.”

“For decades now they have been telling us that whites are the only group not allowed to be proud of their heritage or be proud of their race,” wrote someone called Jarin01. “It’s time to stop bowing to people that hate us and start working together for our own best interests.”

And then there were those who didn’t bother with the concern trolling or careful euphemisms, instead letting their racist freak flags fly. One commenter suggested potential posterers skip the “It’s Okay to be White” posters and simply post propaganda from Atomwaffen instead, because, in his view, the racist terrorist group, whose members are already responsible for five murders, is “the only ideologically consistent pro white group that exists.”

More than a few commenters issued vague but threatening “warnings” to SJWs supposedly defaming white men and whites in general. “Push a man into a corner with nowhere to go but forward and see what happens,” warned someone called datdbui6.

Several commenters suggests that “what might happen” is that whites could launch a new Holocaust and unleash global devastation. “Don’t piss off white people,” wrote RedCBR900.

They’re weak and stupid until they aren’t anymore, and no one on the planet can dish as much at them.Beware.

0signal0 made the threat more explicit:

Friendly reminder that when whites chimp out, world wars happen.

The last time a white nation said “we’ve had enough”, Europe got destroyed.

It’s not wise to piss off people who exhibit both a high IQ and organization talent.

Yes, these guys are identifying with the Nazis in their imagined scenarios.

There were, of course, some who were troubled — if not horrified — by the poster campain, and the discussion itself. “This isn’t mgtow related content this is way to political,” complained one.

Meanwhile, a former subreddit regular called zUltimateRedditor lamented that the subreddit had become “a white supremacist shithole. So glad I left.”

Apparently the subreddit’s pervasive misogyny is fine but the racism crosses the line.

MGTOWs and white supremacists have skirmished over the years, with some of the latter even suggesting that the MGTOW movement is a Jewish plot to destroy white marriage and lower white birthrates.

But the two groups have largely set aside their differences on the white baby issue to come together over their shared hatreds —though some MGTOWs are loath to acknowledge it. If the subreddit’s mostly warm embrace of this racist postering campaign is any indication, the Venn Diagram of MGTOWs and white supremacists may ultimately come to resemble a single circle.

If you see any of these posters up in your area, please document them. And then maybe do this.

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By David Futrelle

Incels are celebrating Halloween the same way they celebrate pretty much every holiday — by calling for the murder of women.

On Incels.co, the regulars are losing their shit over photos of an Instagram mom taking her kids trick or treating in an extremely skimpy cat costume — a perfect opportunity for the assembled mob to decry the degeneracy of the West while ogling the ass of a hottie.

One commenter calls for “a jihad against foids” (that is, women); another cries out “death to the west.” Several others blame this “degeneracy” on the Jews, because why not blame the Jews for everything?

One commenter takes a moment to fantasize about the woman’s sex life in exceedingly graphic detail:

A mom that posts shit like this to public is also the same kind of mom to have multiple sexual partners and fuck while her kids are in the house and probably watching as well. Probably takes [big black cock] with the doors open and gives her little man kisses goodnight with her herpes-infested lip and cum-soaked breath

TFW your critique of “degenerate” culture turns into a the worst Penthouse Letter ever.

In another thread, the regulars lament their lost childhoods, with one commenter declaring that when he was a kid Halloween was

the one day where I could wear a mask and hide my subhuman face and nobody knew what I actually looked like.

Now that they’re adults — or at least teenagers — the holiday has lost whatever charms it once may have held for them.

I fucking hate hallowen, its a holiday were all women get to be the whores they know they are deep down inside. FOR CHAD. I also fucking hate obnoxious yuppies that use obscure concepts as a costume. JUST PUT ON A NINJA MASK YOU CUCK.

Maybe this is why you’re not getting invited to parties, fellas. That and all the calls for murder.

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By David Futrelle

A cryptocurrency guru who calls himself Crypto de Medici is celebrating the start of #NoNutNovember by bringing the gospel of Semen Retention to his nearly 90 thousand Twitter followers.

Mr. de Medici generally posts about such topics as bitcoin, vaping, and the alleged “Globalist War Against Nationalism.” But today he’s all about precious bodily fluids and energy vibrations.

I guess he’s probably right about the vibrations. A lot of dudes end up vibrating fron sheer horniness after several days of not whacking the mole.

But Mr. de Medici isn’t just about not masturbating. He also thinks men should refrain from ejaculation during sex most of the time as well — saving their seed for special occasions.

And if you play your cards right, penis-havers, you can snatch some sex energy from the ladies without giving up any of your own!

Don’t listen to the “Shadow Men” telling you that sex has anything to do with making babies.

Similarly, you shouldn’t listen to the doctors who tell you that masturbation can lower your risk of prostate cancer. Because apparently they are all in the pocket of Big Wank.

He’s really into the vibrations., BTW.

I’m pickin’ up good vibrations
Not doin’ the masturbations (oom bop bop)
I’m pickin’ up good vibrations (good vibrations, oom bop bop)
Not doin’ the masturbations (masturbations, oom bop bop)

Good, good, good, good vibrations (oom bop bop)
Not givin’ me excitations (excitations, oom bop bop)
Good, good, good, good vibrations (oom bop bop)
Not givin’ me excitations (excitations)

Oh, and one final thing that’s very important for all of us to know is that he is NOT into cuckold porn. Definitely not, no way!

Who could have ever guessed that a cryptocurrency obsessive would have weird opinions on other subjects?

Oh yeah, everybody.

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By David Futrelle

Look, everyone, it’s yet another dude who thinks that female orgasms are a myth.

How bad do you have to be at sex to post something like this? How completely lacking in self-awareness?

Alas, it gets worse, with the inclusion of some Evo Psch and possibly the creepiest take on female genital mutilation I’ve ever seen.

nndtx6eriy7cuol8iyvftuovt

H/T — found this in r/BadWomensAnatomy; couldn’t locate the original source

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By David Futrelle

Hey, remember a little over a month ago when Reddit banned the Braincels subreddit — the the site’s main hangout for incels — as well as an assortment of other hateful subs?

Well, the incels are back, posting their repugnant nonsense in a bunch of new subreddits as well as in several that never were banned in the first place. The most active of the new batch seems to be the 22-day-old CommunityCels. But there are eight other incel-related subreddits that remain unbanned, including new ones like ArabCels (21 days old) and ProudMaleFeminists (22 days old), as well as several older ones (including ShortCels, TruestCel and IncelsWithoutHate) that somehow avoided the ban a month ago.

Have the commenters in these subs toned it down a little to avoid a future ban? Not exactly. Here are some recent posts from CommunityCels.

Same old same old.

I thought this one from TruestCel was nice, too.

Hey Reddit admins, do you have anything to say about this?

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By David Futrelle

So-called Men Going Their Own Way are having trouble getting over the long-running soap opera of Jim and Pam from The Office, a show that ceased production more than six years ago.

Not that they’re fans of either character. In the last few months, MGTOW Redditors have twice posted the same screencap from 4chan calling Pam a bitch; last year one MGTOW typed out a ten-point statement that he thought proved Jim was “the biggest Simp in Fiction.”

Their feelings about these two fictional characters and their imaginary sex lives seem, well, curiously strong. Take this exchange, found in yet another Jim/Pam thread in the MGTOW subreddit.

These guys seem to have spent quite a lot of time thinking about “roy types” having sex with — sorry, “railing” — Pam. I’m not quite sure which character they’re even jealous of in this scenario.

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By David Futrelle

Well, here’s a new one, or at least a new variation on an old theme: According to one prolific commenter on Incels dot co, women are responsible for turning men into pedophiles — sorry, ephebophiles — because only underage girls are into weird, incel-looking guys. The proof? The incel making this absurd argument has a 14-year-old female cousin who thinks Adam Driver is hot.

“[T]here exists a whole class of men who cannot attract women their own age as they enter their 20s, yet they remain attractive to girls between the ages of 13-17,” Rassimov wrote in a post on Incels dot co today,

Why? Because they aren’t quite truecel, yet they never develop into traditionally handsome men “real women” crave for. Their youthful looks become a curse when it comes to attracting women past their rebellious teen phases.

His evidence? An informal survey with a sample size of two.

My two female cousins are perfect examples of this transition of preferences; the older one who is almost 19 likes masculine types with buzzed hair, the younger one is 14 and thinks Kylo Ren is the pinnacle of male aesthetics, the older one considers him plain ugly.

Yeah, it’s not as if any adult women are into Adam Driver or Benedict Cumberbatch or any number of other male celebrities who don’t look like the male models with perfectly chiseled faces that incels are convinced that all women exclusively desire.

Rassimov is convinced that it’s only “a matter of time” before both cousins “go Chad only.” According to his logic, the only female human beings incels have a chance with are the ones who aren’t old enough to consent to sex.

Notice how younger teen girls would still have a diverse array of crushes that include “artsy” unconventional types who are skinny, pale men with narrow jaws and unique features, but by the time she’s 20 she cringes at her former crush asking herself “Eww… what was I thinking?”.

Not sure you’re accurately channeling the minds of young women here, chief.

Girls are pretty much basic-bitches by the time they enter their 20s and the only two acceptable standards becomes either; ripped Chad or dad-bod Chad.

In Rassimov’s mind, incels are basically being forced to obsess over girls as young as 13 because no one else will have them. Even if he were right about female tastes — and he’s very definitely not — it’s an appalling argument, just another way these guys are constantly trying to normalize and excuse their obsessive fixation on underage girls.

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By David Futrelle

Now I know you ladies like to complain about that pesky pay gap. But there’s no need to worry your pretty little heads (or bodies) about it, because some dude on Quillette has some great ideas on how to extract all the money you need from hapless cash-rich, sex-poor men. Even if — especially if — you live in a mining town, as so many of you gals do these days.

Take it away, Jerry Barnett, self-described “technologist, author, and campaigner.”

On the surface, in a mining town, the gender pay gap is huge, with the vast majority of money officially going to men.

“Officially.”

And yet, by Saturday morning, much of the cash has been transferred to bar owners, prostitutes, girlfriends, and wives.

But Jerry doesn’t seem to mind about the money going to bar owners. He’s more concerned about the money “transferred” to the latter three groups because of all the sex.

While most fair-minded people would no doubt agree that women should be free to take mining jobs if they choose, it’s unlikely that many women want such gruelling, dangerous, and unhealthy work when being a bar prostitute, a girlfriend, or a wife to a miner is available as an alternative.

I’m sure there’s nothing grueling or dangerous about being a sex worker in a testosterone-heavy mining town in the middle of nowhere.

Later on in the same post, Mr. Barnett tries to prove that men are “the low-value sex,” biologically speaking. As partial evidence for this claim, he cites … marijuana plants.

Even in plants (at least those species that produce separate male and female flowers), the females are forced to invest more. It is no coincidence that marijuana farmers destroy male plants, and retain the females for their big, resin-heavy flowers. Females are more valuable, almost everywhere.

Even later, he talks about cave men hunting the “largest mammals” to extinction so they could give the cave ladies meat for sex, thus making these big beasts “an early casualty of the human sex trade.” (Never mind that there’s no actual evidence of the meat-for-sex hypothesis; it’s just an evo psych “just so” story.)

Now, technically, Barnett didn’t mention mammoths by name. But “largest mammals?” Come on. I think this is close enough to count as a “we hunted the mammoth to feed you have sex with you” moment caught in the wild.

Really a lot of innovative thinking going on over on the Quillette there.

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By David Futrelle

Fellas! Have you heard about this thing called a “bra?” The ladies wear them on their boobs and get this, they don’t just wear them to keep their bazoongas from going all floppy when they walk around. No, sometimes ladies use sophisticated bra technology to make their boobs look bigger than they really are! So they can hypnotize you with their big boobs … even if they don’t have big boobs!

A couple of days ago one Man Going His Own Way called end_all_wars posted a 100% medically accurate diagram of the effects of this devious technology in the MGTOW subreddit to let his colleagues know about the insidious danger of this sort of false falsie advertising.

Terrifying, huh? These devious ladies have various boob-enhancing technologies at their disposal — from pushup bras to padded bras to chicken-cutlet-looking silicon bra inserts, which can apparently turn the tiniest of breasts into Dolly-Partonesque uberboobs. Or so say the MGTOWs who have encountered this technology in the wild.

“I got fooled a few times LOL,” wrote someone called CpuDoc67.

Nothing is worse than when you are expecting melons and you end up with two bee stings.

The experience of seeing giant balloon boobs transform into regular-sized boobs with the removal of the bra is apparently quite traumatic.

“I wouldn’t call them bee stings.” wrote TheTruthSetYouFree.

[M]ore like, bread dough before its cooked, lumpy and kind of weirdly shaped. small for sure … but so poorly formed and droopy you just want to puke. been fooled HARDCORE only once but fuck, looked like DD to a post pregnancy flappy shitty ass B cup that somehow was small and also have the gravitational effects of a J cup.

A commenter called Scaralamozzi was also quite discomboobulated the first time he witnessed a small breast reveal.

The first time i noticed how much pushup is there in a bra i was shocked. I still remember the exact moment it happened.

Another commenter was stunned to discover that even b-cup boobs are affected by the forces of gravity.

I legit had 2 young girls in their twenties with saggy b cups that I thought would be firm c-cups. Oh well, I fucked them anyways but it was weird having to hold up their tits when I grabbed them.

So weird to discover that boobs are not in fact bags of sand.

A commenter called Valor_X was rocked to his core by the mere notion of pushup bras.

When I first learned about push up bras it blew my mind

It was all a lie

Indeed. some suggested that all the things that women do to make themselves look more conventionally attractive are cruel deceptions. According to Paul_G1, these tactics

It’s the equivalent of a guy wearing 3 inch insoles and a muscle suit under his shirt with a George Clooney mask.

Says everything

It’s all lies

The plastered on make up,hair extensions, the push up bras, the tights that firm up their flat asses.

Take it off it’s like wtf? What happened? Why the fuck do you look shit? Bait and switch.

It’s been accepted as normal now.

Always look at her as what she is. The raw thing. I know women that wake up 30 mins before their “bf” Just to do their makeup. The man’s never seen her real face.

The horror.

I’m going to go lie down for a while to recover.

But before I go: MGTOWs and other misogynists, as you may have gathered from that last comment, also have very strong feelings about makeup in general (and lipstick in particular), which you can read about to your heart’s content in the Mammoth archives.

H/T — Reddit’s badwomensanatomy subreddit, which reposted the wonderful diagram above.

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By David Futrelle

He said the thing! I always enjoy it when I run across an example of the exact very thing I’m mocking in the title of the blog: some dude claiming that men today deserve a grateful “thank you” from the women of the world because, in the old old old old old days cave men (allegedly) hunted mammoths to feed their lazy cave wives sitting idly at home eating prehistoric bon bons and dreaming of cave Chad.

Never mind that this is, anthropologically speaking, nonsense; in hunter-gatherer societies everyone works and it’s the gathering, not the hunting, that provides most of the calories. And never mind that there’s no clear evidence that men were the only ones who hunted. Or that whoever hunted back then (everybody?) probably mostly hunted much smaller game that was less likely to gore them to death with their mighty tusks.

Anyhoo, today’s Dude Who Said the Thing is ranting YouTube misogynist Warcorpse666 — real name Dave Nordahl — who presumably earned the right to that internet nickname by besting Warcorpses 1 through 665 in hand-to-hand combat. His recent rant on the subject was brought to my attention by the guy who does the Angry White Men blog, which is incidentally very good. Take it away, you big woolly beardo:

I swear I didn’t hire him to say that as some sort of sneaky guerilla marketing scheme for the blog.

Warcorpse666 is not the first person to SAY THE THING. In addition to the anonymous internet rando who provided me with the name for the blog, there have been many others over the years, some of whom I’ve covered here. Enjoy these MAMMOTH CLASSICS featuring ACTUAL MAMMOTHS.

You Nagged Us to Hunt the Mammoth to Feed You: A new variation on an old misogynist tall tale

Women drain men’s life force (semen) and prevent them from hunting mammoths, MGTOW Redditor warns unironically

This one deals with a slightly more novel thesis:

We Extincted the Mammoth to Male-Genocide You

Enjoy! I’m going to go eat some meat that I did not personally hunt.

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By David Futrelle

Caste Football is an online forum devoted to the premise that white athletes (sorry, White athletes) are terribly discriminated against in professional sports. According to the site’s posting guidelines:

The purpose of Caste Football is to root for White athletes and to see that they receive their due in American society and that they participate in athletic endeavors on a level playing field. We reject the institutionalized discrimination that exists against White athletes in sports, and the belittling and negative stereotyping of White athletes that exists in the media.

In other words, it’s a site filled with white guys who are terrified that black athletes are cuckolding white men in general and them in particular by simply existing and being good at sports. And I’m not jumping to any rash conclusions about their sexual insecurities here. Sometimes Caste Football commenters basically come out and say it.

Consider, for example, the weird worries of one forum regular called Shadowlight. The prolific Caste Football contributor, with more than 2000 comments to his name, apparently finds himself “in such a bleak mood I can’t even breath [sic] properly. I am currently lost in a fog of darkness don’t even ask.”

There’s no need to ask, as Shadowlight is eager to tell us.

The media is very good at playing the sadomasochistic /sadist game where white athletes are pummeled to death and black athletes are elevated into a spiritual realm. The breathless talk about Lamar Jackson today is outright pagan worship.

I’m not sure Shadowlight really understands what pagan worship looks like.

It seems to me there has been a major push for years to turn white athletes into a lesser species.

A lesser species? Oh dear. It’s only going to get weirder from here, isn’t it? (SPOILER: It does.)

Forget the strength factor. That is a 12th century concept that has little bearing on the modern world. Modernity is based on speed and the media is making the average Joe believe that this is only a black domain.

I would ask how exactly Shadowlight thinks the media doing this, but he doesn’t seem very big on providing evidence for his weird claims.

Imagine a future NFL where there really aren’t white wide receivers ( perhaps a few back up types) and maybe say 12 white defensive starters spread throughout the entire league and a few white QBs and TEs. Most white players will be willing white OL and kicker/punters.

The horror!

What do we end up with? A third sex and we are 3/4 of the way there as I post this.

A third what now?

White men will be relegated to a third sex which is pitched between women and black men. Black men will embody the masculine man with all the attendant glory that will afford. White men will be seen ( again we are close now to this in the public sphere) as little booty inferior boys that can’t compete with what society deems as real men and heroes ala black athletes.

“Little Booty Inferior Boys” is the name of my Little Feat tribute band.

Shadowlight’s brand of racist paranoia is hardly new; it’s just a slightly modified version of the “black brute” theories that have filled the overactive imaginations of sexually insecure white racists for centuries (and which I wrote about in some detail here).

As Matthew Hudson pointed out in an essay on Slate, white people viewing blacks as somehow “superhuman” isn’t really a compliment. In one study Hudson discusses, whites were more likely to attribute certain superhuman physical traits — like imperviousness to pain and hunger — to blacks than to whites. Whites also tend to see black men as tougher and more athletic than whites. Meanwhile, the popularity of racialized cuckold porn suggests that the old racist stereotype of black men as exceptionally virile hasn’t gone away either.

The flip side of all this is that many whites tend to think of black people as less intelligent as well — viewing them not so much as superhuman as more animalistic than whites. Indeed, when black people began to enter professional sports in a big way, Hudson quotes sociologist Matthew Hughey as saying,

commentators began to emphasize white cognitive superiority in contrast to the supposedly savage and unbridled physical superiority of blacks. Accordingly, a popular culture narrative of ‘black brawn’ versus ‘white brains’ emerged.

This is how white men with inferiority complexes and deep sexual insecurities manage to turn even their own self-doubts into support for white supremacy. Shadowlight’s exercise in self-flagellation isn’t just weird and a little cringeworthy; it’s a symptom of a deep and ugly racism that, unfortunately, isn’t confined to the virtual pages of the Caste Football forums.

H/T to the Blue Pill subreddit for pointing me to Shadowlight’s comment and r/GamerGhazi, which linked to Hudson’s essay.

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