By David Futrelle
Apparently the sorts of dudes I write about on this blog are just out there in the real world, some of them dating women who have no idea about the fetid misogynistic notions rattling around in their boyfriends’ heads.
Take, for example the perplexed woman (or the extremely convincing perplexed-woman-impersonator) who turned to the Relationship Advice subreddit for help the other day after discovering that her boyfriend of five years doesn’t think women should be allowed to vote.
Because somehow this has become an issue for some men in the last several years.
“I’m so confused, I don’t know what to think” began the women, calling herself randomaccount1775.
I’m not even sure if this is the proper sub but I just feel that I need some advice.
In the time I have known him, my boyfriend has always fell politically independent, or so I thought. Politics was never an issue between us at all.
But then things took a little bit of a turn.
However he just admitted to me that over the past year he’s grown more and more extreme in his views, to the point that he believes women have ruined the country (we are American) and that they should not be allowed to vote.
This is basically the political equivalent of learning that your beloved is one of those dudes who smears his own feces on the walls in public bathrooms just for fun.
He says he did not feel comfortable telling me about this sooner because he thought he would lose me.
And hopefully he will.
I’m upset and I can’t tell if I’m wrong to be upset about this because I know that everyone is entitled to have their own views, but now I just feel as though he doesn’t even value my own input/views.
How fucked is it that she’s the one questioning herself over his terrible opinions.
He has assured me that he still thinks that I should be allowed to vote but that women in general should not.
Repeal the 19th Amendment! Except for my girlfriend, who might get mad and dump me like the garbage I am!
This is a person I have been with for almost 5 years.
SUNK COST FALLACY.
We’ve talked about marriage. I don’t know what to think. In all other aspects he is the perfect, most amazing partner, and I can’t imagine my life without him in it.
Start imagining.
But this suddenly has me rethinking about a lot.
Keep rethinking as you throw out this entire man.
Amazingly, she still worried that she was the one who was acting weird here.
Am I wrong to be questioning our relationship over his new beliefs? As his girlfriend am I supposed to be tolerant and respectful of his views even though I may (strongly) disagree? I can’t tell if I’m overreacting to this or not. The whole situation has made me feel terrible and I’m so confused.
Happily, enough people on Reddit assured the woman that she wasn’t the one in the wrong here that she decided — as she explained in an update — that she would “confront my boyfriend later this evening.”
There’s been no update since then; hopefully the confrontation ended (or will end) with him being shown the door. Or the window.
H/T — Twitter’s relationships.txt
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